Starfleet Jedi

Versus the Luggage.

Who wins?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Luggage

. . . for those, like me, who were unaware.

I don't know about sci-fi vs. magic stuff (ugh), but in most every case I can say that the Empire and Federation will be mere footnotes in the Culture's campaign, whatever said campaign might entail.

(I don't know enough about the Culture to guess, but I know enough to say with fair-to-middlin' certainty that the Culture could lay waste to both ST and SW accidentally.)

2046 wrote:I don't know about sci-fi vs. magic stuff (ugh), but in most every case I can say that the Empire and Federation will be mere footnotes in the Culture's campaign, whatever said campaign might entail.

That campaign would entail being eaten. Seriously; this thread isn't serious, the Luggage is just about the only thing that I would say is literally unbeatable in fantasy. It even beat bigger and nastier versions of itself in Interesting Times, numerous Lovecraftian horrors in Sourcery and (briefly) ate the Octavo in The Light Fantastic.

(I don't know enough about the Culture to guess, but I know enough to say with fair-to-middlin' certainty that the Culture could lay waste to both ST and SW accidentally.)

Nah, the Culture's far too precise and subtle. Most of what makes them terrifying is how much control they have over what they can do as much as anything else. If they wanted to, they could actually act without ever being so much as detected by the Federation, but they'd probably choose to beat the Luggage by merely adopting it. The Luggage only reacts violently to violence, and is actually quite sedate until either itself or Rincewind is threatened in any way.

Actually, I think luring the Luggage into a holodeck might just work.
Just give it a nice, friendly holodeck environment and it should be fine.

Or send in Picard et. al. to be nice. If there is one thing the Federation beats almost every single other Sci-Fi power in with ease it's being nice.

Heck, they managed to talk people shooting at them and downright hating them into peace ;)

So weapons can't destroy it or what?

Mr. Oragahn wrote:So weapons can't destroy it or what?

Imagine an angry, murderous version of the TARDIS that eats people.

The Federation and Culture beat it through passive diplomacy, but the Empire might get eaten eventually, since they are a more agressive culture.